You travelling with two sheila's are ya mate?
Ahh yep.
Two hey?
Yep.
Be a bit of fun hey.
Yeah.. yeah.
Just sign there.
They get, ah, real easy when they travel? Loosen up a bit hey?
Mate of mine reckons he picks them up all the time.
Alright.. Thats it?
Yep, yep.
Onya champ, don't do anything I wouldn't do hey?
Nah, I won't.
Send us a card.
Alright.
Fucking tool.
How funny is that?
I like that one.
D'you reckon?
Yep.
How long is this gonna take mate?
Not long.
How long is "not long"?
Well, I've almost got it.
Yep. Yep! Ok.
Yep. Yep..
Yep.
Yep..
He fancies you.
No he doesn't.
Does.
He fancies you.
I don't think so.
You know, the three of us are going to be stuck in a car together for three weeks and it'll be trying enough without "Is it me?" or "Is he being weird today?".
It'll drive me barmy.
Yeah. You're right.
He is cute though.
Think he's really got a girlfriend in Sydney?
Well why would he lie?
He's a bloke.
Can't believe we're leaving.
I know.
Feels like two years, not two weeks.
Want a lift?
I thought I requested purple?
Hey for 1500 bucks we're lucky it's got doors.
I love it!
Hey where's my stuff?
Oh we forgot about food for you, sorry.
Yeah we thought you'd get by on our gratitude and appreciation.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Where's the booze?
Oh we've made a decision. After last night never drinking again.
Yeah we've got to get an early start if we want to get to Wolf Creek by tomorrow night.
Uh-huh.
Piss off. Of course I checked.
How much of an organisation nazi is she?
No, she's right. In bed by 9:30.
Nothing there to smoke.
Knock it off! Aww!
Is that your beer?
Archie, pleased to meet ya.
Nice to meet you.
That's a pretty nice handshake there.
Lovely!
I can pack a punch.
You can pack a punch? Now why would you want that?
I would, if I had to.
If you had to? Oooh ho ho. Yeah.
You wanna listen to some of his bullshit stories.
Aww, bullshit!
In your dreams! Fuck off!
Boardy! Guts behind me! 10 foot damn spray!
I think it's past 9:30.
I got the worst taste in my mouth.
I'd like to sing, a song for you.
Ok, I'll restart again.
I love her, I really really love her.
Make me smile, all the time.
When you cook my food, when you clean my room. I love you Mum, I love you Mum.
He's been playing guitar for a few weeks now. And he's really really really crap.
Really Crap. Really shit.
Oh my god.
Yeah that's cool.
Thats amazing.
You do know you're near the world's 5th biggest UFO siting?
Get fucked.
Christy, I'm serious!
Well I know!
Well don't.. I can hear you laughing!
What? I'm listening!
Fine.
I'm listening. Go! Tell me!
Nah, don't worry about it!
Just tell me. I'm listening.
Alright, well I heard about this guy who driving on the highway out there.
And, he see's this light ahead of him. Around 500 metres.
And, first he thinks it's a truck or a semi-trailer or something coz the light's really bright, like glowing orange and shit.
Yeah.
But as he gets closer he realizes the lights about 10 metres off the ground, it's hanging in mid air.
So he's scared. He's freaking out.
And then he hears this CRACK. Like an explosion.
That was supposed to scare us.
I know, it's not scary.
Alright, but he did. He heard this crack.
Like an explosion, of a jet.
And it just took off into the sky. Straight up like a rocket.
And then as soon as it was gone, his car just stopped in the middle of the road.
And it was totally silent, and he was just sitting there.
Staring up at the stars.
In the middle of nowhere.
Hey! For no reason, just stopped.
Is that a true story? Absolutely! He's got something.. You've got something dripping off the side of your lip there.
Oh, it's all right. It was just bullshit.
Nah bullshit you mate!
What's all this shit?
Oh it's the tent.
Yeah for the tent. Here I'll do that. Start on the tent.
No, you do the tent.
I don't know what you two would do without me.
I didn't finish that.
Oh sorry.
I finished it for you.
Alright?
Now we've just got a six hour drive.
Who's driving first?
I don't know, I'll go in the back. Is that alright with you?
Yeah.
Yeah alright, we'll go in there.
Do you want to drive?
Well, well, well.
Hey umm, can I have the keys?
Oh it's ok you two. I've got it, thanks!
No problems guys.
Hows the hair?
Day One, Captains Log: So far no sign of intelligent lifeforms.
Starting to doubt.. Hey..
Howdy. Howdy.
Umm, do you wanna say hello?
Hello.
Righto, whats your name?
Graham. Graham.
Nice to meet you Graham.
I'm Ben.
This one too? Yeah mate.
I think someone's got a crush on you.
Yeah the attendant, I thught so. Graham. No.
Uh uh.
Aww.
I'm getting the feeling it's mutual. Am I wrong?
You know it's true.
Aww, do you mind?
I think it's absolutely fabulous.
Don't go dicking her around, because she's totally brilliant. If you hurt her I'm gonna have to kill you.
So my advice is we all have an awesome time together. You sort out what is going on between you and this girlfriend you've allegedly got.
By the time we get to Cairns we'll find some freakishly hot man for me.
And we'll all go crazy together, alright?
Alright.
Mmm, she's only a little one isn't she.
I bet we could break that in half real quickly hey?
Heh, and you'd still be watching mate.
Here comes yours now mate.
What a place huh?
Hey uh, hey mate, oi.
Oi.
Hey come here, got a question for you.
Alright.
How you going?
Hey uh, me and me mates are gonna see if your girlfriends would be interested in a little bit of a gang bang?
We just wanna make sure it's alright with you first.
Yeah good on ya.. fuckhead.
Oi, what did you say?
I said..
I said thats um, a nice smile you got.
Dazza, don't be a dickhead.
See you later sweetheart.
Bye!
Fucking arseholes.
Bunch of morons, honestly.
Yeah, forget about it Ben.
Ahh, should have smashed him.
I should have Tai Chi'd his arse.
I'm serious!
Weather's shit.
Yeah all of a sudden.
I think it's the start of the wet season, so..
Thats beautiful over there isn't it.
That light coming up through the mountains is gorgeous.
I hope it doesn't rain.
What?
I said I hope it doesn't rain.
Man it's gonna be cold tonight, and I mean cold.
Great.
Hey I think that's the start of it.
Says in there you've got to climb over the top.
Umm, yep.
Aww..
What was that?
Rock.
There's just nothing out here.
Yeah, it's great.
Here we go. Wolf Creek Crater!
The crater, we're here!
Walking trail! Walking trail! Allow three hours.
Three hours?
So is that three hours to get all the way into the middle or just to get up to the top?
I'd imagine to the top.
No camping, hiking is allowed. Put your rubbish in a bin. No fires. Ok.
Ok, let's go.
Madame. Thankyou.
Wolf Creek awaits you.
Oh wow.
Wolf Creek!
Wow..
What is with this weather?
Maybe we should take an umbrella.
Yeah.
Yeah definitely.
Alright, so what do you want to take? Definitely this!
All of it. All that what's in the esky. All the food.
And who's carrying all this?
You are.
Just all of it.
Alright, three hours.
Let's do it!
Let's go.
Oh, wait!
Oh there's poo everywhere, yay!
We're on the poo planet.
What are you doing? It's not even raining that bad.
Yeah it is.
It's freezing and I've got no jumper.
Where did the meteorite go? It's in the middle.
It just went into the ground? Yep.
Look how good it looks.
Cooooeee!
Come on!
You alright?
Wow.
That's impressive.
Yeah you're looking at one of the biggest meteorite craters on the planet.
They reckon that the explosion from the impact would have been like 200 nuclear bombs going off at the same time.
Some guys discovered it scouting for an ore company in 1947.
Imagine being the first person to see it.
Hey come on, let's go.
You right?
This is great Ben.
Yeah, just fantastic. Thank you.
Such a sweetheart arent you?
Loving it.
Yeah.. it's great.
Sorry, I didn't know.
It'll clear, give it a couple of hours.
Thankyou.
Back soon.
Where you going?
I wonder why the meteor hit here.
In this place. Nowhere else.
Maybe it was..
drawn to something in the earth.
Like when lightning strikes.
Hmm.
Yeah?
Hmm.
Hi!
Hey!
That's awesome.
I was wondering what that would be like.
Chris, what's the time?
Err, don't know, watch has stopped.
Looks like Niagara Falls. Woo!
Hey have you got the time?
Ahh no, it's busted.
I'd say it's about 7?
So about an hour till dark.
Make it back to Halls Creek easy
Christie's watch stopped too.
Bullshit.. really?
Yeah.
6:30. Mine too.
What? Batteries or something?
You got the keys?
Make sure you warm her up first.
It's weird weather hey?
Yeah I reckon. God.
See you later Wolf Creek.
What's wrong?
I don't know.
Did we leave the lights on?
No. No.
Is it.. Is it in gear?
Nah, Try.. Try again.
Ahh.. fuck.
Ok..
Shit..
Alright, pop.. pop the hood.
It's probably just the battery terminals.
Do you know what you're looking for?
You gonna tell Liz?
I've got a feeling she already knows.
I'll go see what I can do.
You didn't leave the lights on did you?
No. No.
Looks like we might be spending the night.
This is fucked.
Bitch.
Do you think it means anything?
I mean..
the watches, and the car not working.
What do you mean?
Well.. you know the stories I was telling you last night about the UFO's and stuff.
and..
when they were around..
well.. things stopped working.
Could be the same kind of thing.
Ben I really don't think we need to be talking about that right now.
Ok..
There's something out there.
And it ain't no man. No. No. I saw some lights.
Where?
Right..
Right there. There.
What the hell?
Nah, nah, nah! Don't fucking.. what?
Well it might be a car!
Well it might not be a car!
That don't look like no car!
Shit. It's coming this way.
Fuck it is coming this way!
Shit!
Fuck!
Shit it is coming this way!
Well should we run?
No, no, no, no! Just stay in the car!
Don't move!
Hang on it's a car!
Well how do you know?
It's a bloody car.
Shit!
You can hear the engine!
Well what the bloody hell are you mob doing out here?
Scared the shit out of me!
We thought it was aliens!
Well.. she did.
Hi.
Yeah it was pissing down with rain earlier. I was just about to chuck it in. Lucky for you mob I decided to hang around a bit longer hey?
Yeah, we were just getting ready to spend the night too.
Ahh well, we'll get you out of here quick smart.
Aww. If I can undo the bloody spark plug.
Where you heading?
Darwin, sort of.
Ahh yeah and then onto Cairns. That's where we're really headed.
Ahh.. long drive.
Yeah. Yeah, it's too long.
British are ya's? Yeah.
That's right, yeah.
Ben's an Aussie though.
Yeah? Where ya from mate?
Sydney.
Poofta capital of Australia!
Ahh, just playing with you tiger. Never been over there myself.
Lucky you sheila's are travelling with a bloke.
Can't be too careful.
Nothing wrong with the battery.
I told you we'd be alright.
You know he's hilarious. He's like one of those guys from the outback Australia shows. Crocodile Dundee.
Yeah he's a pisser.
Well you're an Aussie Ben. How come you don't talk like him?
You want the bad news or the really bad news?
Well your coil's rooted.
Cactus.. You're not going nowhere.
Well what can we do?
Fuck I hate it totally checked before we left. Ben.
Well there must be something we can do?
Yeah well, you take the old one out, bung the new one in, and Bob's your sister.
Only good news is I got the gear to do it.
Problem is it's back at my camp, just down the road a'ways.
Well I'm going back down there anyways so I could give you a tow.
Fix it tongight, probably have you on the road by the morning.
Otherwise, someone will be coming through here.
Eventually.
Anyway, make up your mind coz I gotta get a rattle on.
Yeah Thanks. Thankyou. Thankyou.
Well what do you guys want to do?
Might as well.
Well he's not going to fix it for free is he? I mean, what if he wants a couple of hundred pounds or something?
A thousand? What?
Ok, ok, well first we gotta find out if he wants any money or not.
I don't have a lot of cash on me.
Me neither.
Neither have I.
Why don't we get him to tow us back into town and we'll get someone there to fix it?
Yeah.
Ok.
Why don't you go on? You go and ask him.
I don't want to ask him.
No go on. It's a bloke thing. Go on.
Yeah you ask him, it's a bloke thing.
Oh, it's a bloke thing.
Do you need any help?
Nah I'm alright thanks son.
Alright.
Got a certain way of putting it in, you know?
I know it's a long way, but the girls were wondering if you could tow us back into town? I mean, we don't want to put you out any more than we already have.
Look I'd really like to help you mate but I'm not heading that way, you know. If you don't want the lift well that's up to you. But I'm heading south.
South..
Yeah south.
You wanna go north. I'm heading south.
Bit of a bugger. Bugger!
So umm..
Well. with that coil and stuff. Yeah.
How much would that cost?
Say if we just got..
It's not fucking Pitt Street mate. Course I'm not gonna charge you, ya stupid bastard.
You hear that?
How much?
Ahh, you sure?
Ahh jesus you make me laugh.
You must keep the little buggers amused? Hey?
Yeah.
Amusing the bloody bejesus out of me.
Alright, well I'll get the girls going.
Well that'd be a good idea.
Alrighty.
Well off you go. Off I go.
Where did he say his place was again?
South.
Feels like we've been driving for hours.
Well it shouldn't be too far.
That's what you said an hour ago.
Well ok, lets just get him to drop us off here then. Alright?
It's cool.
He said it was gonna be a bit of a drive didn't he.
It's cool.
Must be some sort of mining operation.
Mmm, looks like a ghost town.
We're here.
Thank god.
Wherever here is.
Have plenty of water there if you want it.
Oh thank you. It's one thing we don't have plenty of. Thank you.
Cheers.
Nothing like rain water from the top end.
Hey Mick, this place is amazing.
Can't believe they just walked out and left all this stuff here.
Plenty of places like this all over the outback. Thousands of them. Places people have forgotten about.
Sposed to be a whole town out there somewhere. Got lost in a 6 month dust storm back in the 40's.
People just walked away.
I heard of blokes getting lost in their own farms.
You know, just never found their way out.
On their own property? It's amazing.
There's one up here that crosses three states right.
Takes 6 days to drive across.
No.
I.. I used to work out there once.
What did you do there?
Head shooter.
You know, clearing vermin. Roo's, horses, pigs, buffalo. You name it.
Don't work there no more.
Yeah yeah, they use poisons, you know, instead of shooters.
Used to.. Used to fly in with the helicopters.
You fly in low over a herd of water buffalo.
Sometimes take out 50 head in an afternoon.
I wore out 5 bolts on a .303 one year!
Pigs, now pigs were different.
You have to get in close. Get the dogs onto them. Then you go in with a knife.
You had to get in under them, you know, while the pig is fighting off the dogs.
And you had to be quick or you'd lose your guts on it's tusk! It's sharp!
I seen a big boar pig, right, take a pit bulls head clean off one time.
His little legs still pumping away.
Fair dinkum!
Fair dinkum?
That's what I said.
Fair dinkum.
Wow..
Poor little fella.
So umm, where do you live?
Oh I get around you know.
Never know where I might pop up!
Man you must love the freedom.
What?
The freedom.
You know, you must love it.
Well you know, hanging out in nature and shit.
Right..
You get to like, you know, cruise around the bush.
Saying cool stuff like..
That's not a knife, this is a knife!
What do you actually do.. now?
I could tell you, but then I'd have to kill you.
So you don't really shoot kangaroos do you?
Nah look I'm doing people a service taking out a few roos. They're everywhere out here now.
Like tourists.
Excuse moi.
Your turn.
Fair go!
Bloody women here son!
Well umm..
I'll let you know when I get her going. What do you reckon?
Thankyou.
Thanks!
But then I'd have to kill you.
What?
Well did you see they way he was looking at you?
He's just trying to impress us with his great big white hunter thing there.
Yeah but he's doing us a favour and he probably doesn't appreciate us cracking jokes at his expense. Seriously.
Lets just get the car fixed.
Yeah thats what we're doing. Don't freak out.
You right?
Fine thanks.
Thanks again for helping us out.
No worries.
Obviously it'll be great to get going as soon as possible.
No worries.
Ben.
Ben move the esky away from the fire.
Ben.
Please don't kill me. Please.
Please!
No!
Please!
Don't kill me! Please!
Don't!
Don't kill me!
Bang!
Well nothing happens when the bolt's open you see.
Uh oh.
No! No! No!
You bastard.
The look on your fucking face.
Why are you doing this?
Please if you let me go I won't tell anyone.
I won't! I won't.
Now now, calm down. Listen to Uncle Michael. Come on.
Now, as I keep telling you, I always use a rubber with you cunts.
Well I don't know where you been!
No, no! Get away from me!
Fuck you! I hate you. Go..
Fuck you cunt! You fucking loser! You fucking loser.
Thank you very much.
Get away.
Now.. you know how I know that you're not gonna tell nobody?
You know how I know?
Fuck!
Ahh, jesus christ Mick!
Rule number 1, put the bloody fire out.
Fuck's sake.
Bloody hell.
Shh. Shh. Where's Ben? Where's Ben?
Ok Shh. Chrissie you have to be quiet. Please.
Ahh, still awake are you?
You know, a man's a real goose hey. I mean, it took 4 hours to get those fucking parts out of your car right. Now the bastard of a thing's all burnt. What do you think of that?
Hey?
Bloody recyclers.
Now..
Where were we?
Hey?
Ohh yeah.
Let's play.. Hey?
You like to play huh?
Yeah you like to play don't you hey?
You like to play hey?
Hey? You like to play do you? Hey?
That stupid bitch over there.
See that stupid bitch over there?
She loved to play.
Oh she lasted a good few months.
We were great together you know?
Till she lost her head.
How about..
How about I cut your tits off hey?
Cut your tits off.
You're all the same you foreign cunts. Weak as piss.
How in the hell did you get out?
You're wasting your time hey. It's not loaded, I only put one up the spout.
Let her go.
Now!
Get away from her!
Now!
Now Lizzie.. a rifle in the wrong hands can be really dangerous.. so.. Give me the fucking gun!
Shoot him! Shoot him!
Go!
No!
What? Where you going?
Where you going?
No! Don't! No! No!
Something here..
Go!
Go! Go! Go Liz!
No, No! Ahh!
Come on.
Push!
What?
To see the lights over!
Come with me.
Are you joking?
Come on.
He's going to check on us.
Let's go.
Oh Fuck!
Did you see Ben?
She'd been alive for months.
We've got to move.
He's going to do that to us.
Can't go that way.
He's going to see we're not down there. I know. I know!
I've got his set of keys. He must have more cars.
I'm not going back there.
Chris, we're in the middle of fucking nowhere. We need a car.
Come on.
Wait here. Wait here.
You alright?
I just gotta catch my breath.
Wait.
You ok?
Yeah.
Alright, it's alright.
Listen Chris.
You're just gonna have to wait here for a minute alright?
No. No!
Please it's just for 5 minutes.
Don't leave me! Please. What if he catches me again?
He won't. He's not going to catch you again.
Please don't leave me. Please.
He's not going to catch you again alright?
You just have to wait here for 5 minutes ok?
I'll be in and out. I'll be quicker on my own ok?
Listen.
Look.
If I'm not back, alright, in 5 minutes.. just..
Head that way, ok. You'll hit a road eventually alright? I.. I'll catch up with you.
Ok, I'm quicker on my own alright?
I'm coming back ok.
Wait.. please.
Just 5 minutes ok? It's ok. It's alright. It's ok.
Don't go.
It's alright.
What if he catches me again?
He's not.. He's not.. He's not gonna catch you again alright?
Listen.
Now just wait here. I'll be right back.
Please hurry.
Ben?
Ben..
Oh it's excellent! Yep! I've never seen better. Oh. Bella bella bella, come on!
See Samantha I'm sure we did. I'm sure we got this fixed.
Honey, I'm not in the mood.. alright?
How's it going mate?
Ahh, not too good. The ahh..
Mick's my name.
Well what do you expect? He's in the country. Thats what happens. Country people are friendly though.
What do you do out here anyway?
Ahh bit of shooting. Bit of this, bit of that. You know.
Thirsty are you? Hey?
Nothing like rainwater from the top end.
Captains log: so far no sign of intelligent lifeforms.
Ahh do you wanna say hello?
Righto, and whats your name?
Graham. Graham.
Nice to meet you Graham.
I'm Ben.
This one too? Yeah mate.
Hey..
Like your little mate said before you know..
That's not a knife, this is a knife.
Hey now come on Lizzie, Come on.
Settle down, you know. That's not gonna kill you.
Right?
Now I got a bullet hole in my neck and I'm not whinging am I? No.
Now I'm gonna hafta do something ahh, Lizzie so as you don't try and run out on me again you know?
It's a.. It's a little trick they used to use in the Vietnam war you know, so they could take prisoners and they still get the same information out of them..
But the little buggers didn't escape. You with me?
You with me?
You see what I mean? Hey?
Now that.. that's for fucking wrecking me fucking truck you bitch.
Now..
This little procedure..
is called..
making a head on a stick.
Because.
Once your spine severed right.
Well, thats what you are hey..
head on a stick.
Now..
Let's talk about your little mate, umm, Chrissie.
Liz..
What happened?
Jesus..
I'll get a blanket.
Get you some help.
No! Fuck!
Fuck..
Come on! Move!
Come on! Come on!
Come on! Bloody move!
Move..
Fuck.. Fuck.
Come on!
No fucking ..
Fuck you!
Arsehole!
Oh fuck no
Ahh jesus.
Yeah!
The winder.